What makes a man sexy?

Dear you,

I’m writing about what it is that makes men sexy. A sexiness from within that has to do with living from a conscious masculine core strength. It’s about knowing what it means to be a powerful, happy man in the world of today.

The answer to what makes men sexy that I am looking for is not a six-pack, flashy car, latest watch, big biceps or a fat paying job. That’s external sexy. Nice, don’t get me wrong. Our body, work identity and appearance are important, but it’s shallow if that’s all there is to us.

I’m talking about sexy from within. True men radiate sexiness. How? They have a strong backbone. A what? How is a spine sexy? But by having a strong backbone I mean living from a conscious masculine core strength. And that is sexy. It’s about a man who knows himself, knows his mission in life, and lives a life of strength, honour, and wisdom.

What do men need to be deeply fulfilled so they can radiate that sexiness I am talking about?

What does it mean to be a powerful, happy man in the world of today?

David Wagner wrote a book called Backbone. I highly recommend it. He describes men who have found their backbone as fearless, robust, loving, wise, steady, fun-loving and ready to protect and serve the world in which they live. Some men had fathers who taught them what it means to be a man. Many didn’t. So how do men nowadays learn about honour, power, sex, protecting family, bravery, dignity and masculine beauty?

backboneFrom a female coach and therapist at www.vitaliscoaching.com. Ha only joking! Go and buy this book, I highly recommend it. They say it’s a bit like Iron John by Robert Bly, a book I still like to read.

David Wagner, the author of Backbone, says that finding that backbone is about knowing yourself deeply. It’s about knowing where you want to go and how to be the man you need to be in order to get there. It’s about consciously choosing the kind of man you want to be, and living it in each and every moment. About enhancing your core strengths and reducing your weaknesses. It’s living from a place of bigness, instead of pettiness and smallness.

Those passive days are over – go find your backbone back

Go claim your true power back. Being truly, deeply happy again. To be fully yourself.

Let me tell you this as a woman, there is nothing more sexy in a man than that potency, that vigour, that comes from living from a core state of being. True power is there when you know who you are, you have your demons in check and you’ve tapped into the ever-present living energy of the universe. Rooted in your essence, soul energy flows. To quote David Wagner “this book won’t get you laid more, but it will help to define what it means to you to be a deeply happy, truly powerful man who knows how get the best of everything from life and also give the very best of himself to life”.

So if you have a summer holiday booked and looking for a read on the beach, you found it. Or no holiday but instead many hours commuting ahead of you in which many pages can be read, go get this book and find your happy.

With love, Karin

For the women out there, go read the first one on this list called Daring Greatly, on courage and authenticity  – female style.


Telegraph InterviewKarin Peeters

PS. I was interviewed by The Telegraph on my take on corporate life, as depicted in the television series Billions. On of my favourite re-Tweets by David Lancefield: “Lost souls in the City: let’s take off our masks & bring our whole selves to work. Powerful by @VitalisCoaching”. Link to article here if you’re curious to read more.


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